Webinare & Videos von der Awareness Week 2020
Webinare & Videos von der Awareness Week 2020
First off, what an amazing awareness week. Holy Moly, it gets better every year. We have some wonderful and creative content creators in our community and I would love to give them a round of applause.
Awareness week for me is so exciting. We get to see our mostly un-talked about condition in the spotlight as our friends, family, and community bring awareness to HS. We get to hear their stories, I get to see your stories. You invite me in to your experience, and it fills my soul. It’s a rush that is difficult to duplicate.
That rush helped me get through my second week of my awareness month and propelling me forward to achieving my goal. After the rush, though, comes the crash.
The last few days have seen me snooze my alarms too frequently, and it has been harder and harder to get out of bed early. This is also the week where my hormones play a major role in my health. Not only are they causing some flares, but are also bring the usual fatigue along with them. Add to the fact that my hormones can cause me to occasionally get slightly anemic, and the fact that I tend to under eat most of the time. This month I have been forcing myself to eat more, however fully getting enough calories to carry me through is going to have to be something I am going to have to monitor every few miles.
This is also time for my mind to throw up a mental wall. Physically, for the most part, I am doing good. Numerically, on paper, my miles are right where I need and want them to be to accomplish the task at hand. With that said, I have entered the mental part of the arena. This is now the longest that I have continuously pushed my body at this level. Even when I had my high mileage month in December, I was unaware of what I could do, or how many miles I could do until the month was at least halfway over. December was littered with breaks that this month I have left no room for. Physically, I am perfectly capable of attacking the rest of this challenge, but I knew there would also be a mental component.
Part of my goal for this last year was to learn how far and how hard I could push myself reasonably, while also acting upon it. My mind on the other hand seems to tell me, hang on, this isn’t our normal. We aren’t used to this level. These are uncharted waters, we need to map, and plan, and slow down, my brain seems to scream. It is pushing me back in the form of fatigue. Begging me for my necessary daily nap as soon as I awake. Some afternoons as I walk my eyes become heavily lidded with drowsiness until the endorphins begin to kick in. Sometimes it is a every long and slow seven miles until that happens. Two days this week, I have had to listen and took my naps not long after first waking because my body needed rest, and after the rest, I was able to fulfill my daily intention to the best of my ability.
Showing up, getting into my mindset of walking is the first major hurdle that I have to tackle each day. On blah days that first mile is the hardest.
On days where I am planning on racking up some major miles, every day this month, sometimes the miles in front of me seem like I am about to embark to a trek up the face of Mount Everest. A mindset like that will not do on a 4 or 5 hour excursion. On those days I take some advice from Dominic Toretto “I live my life a quarter-mile at a time. Nothing else...For those ten seconds or less, I’m free.”
I know where all of the quarter mile invisible markers are on my track. It takes me a little longer than ten seconds to get there, but my focus is my marker. It’s not my next marker, for that period of time it’s my only marker. Once I reach that marker, the past quarter mile is forgotten, and my focus shifts to my next marker, the only one that’s important. Before I know it, my watch is buzzing to alert me that I have hit a milestone.
Then comes the middle of the journey for the day. That is, without a doubt, the longest section mentally. It’s harder to focus on just a quarter mile at a time because you see how far you’ve come, but in looking to see how far I have come, my mind automatically figures how far I have left to go. It can get monotonous, passing the same tree or flower group 50 times a day. Alone with nothing but your thoughts to keep you company. The aches start to creep in. My back needing a stretch, my feet becoming tired. My inner monologue becoming cranky, then BAM, my HS scar tissue begins to throb as if I am some alternate universe Harriet Potter that never received her acceptance letter to Hogwarts, and HS my own personal Voldemort. This cycle can go on for 2 to 3 hours.
Then it happens. A buzz of my fitness watch alerting me to the last mile. Then it is time to fly. If you have ever watched Biker Boyz, when they are ready to race, Laurence Fishburnes character will get tunnel vision. With the aide of Hollywood magic and swirling camera filters, everything melts away, and there is nothing but a focus on the finish line. That may not be what I see, but it is the best way to describe what I feel. The aches and pains don’t matter anymore. My tired feet that felt like they were just hanging on begin to seemingly fly off the ground. My pace quickens, and I’m propelled through time and space by some otherworldly unseen force that somehow, amazingly, resides in me. All of the miles before are impertinent, because in this moment, on this day, I am reaching the apex of being the best I can be. It is addicting, and no matter how tough that first mile is tomorrow, or how much the middle part sucks and tries to break me, I will roll out of bed, tie my laces, and slay the day.
“When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” -Lao Tzu
“If you always put limit on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread to your work and into your life. There are no limits, only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.” -Bruce Lee